Experiential acceptance of parent, child, and relationship

Abstract Experiential acceptance is psychological contact with internal stimuli, including thoughts, feelings, memories, sensations, and behavioral impulses without attempting to control them either through avoidance or attachment. The acceptance and commitment therapy model is not about eliminating experiential control, but rather, recognizing when experiential control is unworkable, and increasing repertoires for experiential acceptance. Within the domain of parenting, experiential acceptance can be understood as including acceptance of the parent’s experiences, the child’s experiences, the parent’s reaction to the child’s experiences, and the ongoing relationship between parent and child. This acceptance is integral to supporting the child’s emotional development through emotion coaching, as well as to parenting in an effective way. In particular, parental experiential acceptance undermines a parenting control agenda, in favor of workable parenting focused on shaping behavior into the future.